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Tipping the Balance


The phrase work-life balance is banded around freely.  Extolled as a virtue towards which we should each aspire I have been wondering, what lies beneath this phrase?  

I come into contact with individuals each week who talk about their day jobs as though they were nothing more than slaves to their employers (or their bank managers).  I am never short of gratitude for their reminders - I am truly fortunate to have extracted myself from a profession I never fully arrived in, before stumbling towards and then tripping head-first into a 'line of work' that feels far better aligned to my true vocation.  

Our fascination with our work means that it is pretty well the first thing we ask one another on first meeting - we are beginning to define ourselves too readily, by our occupations.  Work is no longer our occupation; it is our preoccupation.  I work therefore I am...  Really? 

I claim experience, rather than expertise.  I am an expert only to the extent that I have discovered (through relentless trial and sometimes exhausting error) what does not work for me.  From this, I have deduced those things that seem to work better, and identified those that currently seem to work well.  

Like so many things, the moment we arrive 'there', we need to set off once more:  As nothing remains constant, this mysterious balance requires near-constant and vigilant supervision.  The world is moving around us.  We are forever in transit.  Our approach therefore is necessarily dynamic, requiring review at regular intervals.  What seemed to work then, may no longer serve us.  

In order to change anything we must first be(come) curious...  

So, when speaking of this 'balance' to what, precisely, is it that we are referring?  After all, heading on a quest without a map of the territory will doubtless make for a longer journey.  I am interested in what it is that sits on the other side of the see-saw.  Where is it that each of us can show our real selves - and be met as the imperfect, unfinished works-in-progress?  
And who is it that reminds us who we really are, and what we can be if our hearts so desire it?  Who is it that holds the precious hopes and dreams we are apt to espouse from time to time, and calls us to account on our bucket lists?  For, if there's no one sitting on the opposite side of the see-saw, chances are we'll fly too high - before coming down with a bump.




So, how is your current work-life balance?

Are you merely trying to get through a day?
Are you barely making it to the end of the week?
Do you feel completely exhausted by the time you get home?
Are you feeling stuck on a (metaphorical) hamster wheel, just wanting to get off?
Are you drowning, or falling behind, feeling hopeless you'll ever catch up?





Who am I?
You will want to reflect on your skills, values, interests and priorities. Writing down your thoughts and share your ideas with a professional or someone you trust to be your "accountability buddy."

Doing, in a life of balance, should be driven from who you have decided to be.
Patrick Rhone
Where am I going?
List your goals that match the information gained in the previous stage. Be clear about your personal definition of success.
List goals in each of these areas of your life: faith, family, friends, finances, fitness, fun (yes, fun), future career development, and finally further learning. What investments will you make in each of these areas?

How do I get there?
Develop a strategic action plan to attain your goals on a weekly, monthly and annual basis.

Step 4 is the Evaluation stage, when you determine what went right and what went wrong.


 There is no such thing as work-life balance.
Everything worth fighting for unbalances your life.
Alain de Botton


Getting it right - for you

Visualise your ideal life
Dare to dream and write down the top ten things you want to accomplish on your "life list."

Write down a personal vision statement and mission statement
It will help you see where you are going in life.

Turn off the television
It is a passive activity that won't give you energy.

Limit Internet time
Set better boundaries so that technology does not rule your life.

Pursue your passion persistently
Own it and be disciplined in achieving what you truly desire out of life.

Keep a journal
Writing it regularly will help you to stay focused on what is important to you.

Every weekend 
Set a goal of doing one fun activity.

Define your daily exercise time
What works best for you, 30 minutes in the morning, afternoon or evening?

Go to bed a half hour early and get up a half hour early
This will allow you to carve out additional personal time.

When confronted with a choice, ask yourself:
What's the cost?  Will this add to my life or create more stress?

Let go of the people and things that you feel are holding you back 
(i.e. clutter, negativity, clothing, luxury items, toys, etc.)

Prune any activities that are not productive or non-priorities.

Find 3 things you feel grateful for every night
When you do this you will come to realise that you are too blessed to stress.

Review your Priorities
What are your top 10 priorities for this year?  Rank them in terms of highest, high and low.

Every week make it a goal to call two friends
You are unlikely to ever regret investing in and building these relationships.

Search for the silver linings
Seek to turn every occasion in your life into a positive - seeing negative experiences through a lens that enquires, "What can I learn from this?"

Live simply, expect less and give more.



If you always do what you've always done, you'll only get to where you've already been.  Where you go in life is up to you...  Where you go with your work-life balance needs to be an active choice, and not left to chance. 

So, what is it that you need to 
Start doing…
Stop doing…
Continue doing…
Do more…
Do less…
Do differently…?
How will you know if 2014 is a total success for you?





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